The Etiquette of RSVP

Your Response Matters More Than You Think

“Ugh. Nobody RSVPs anymore,” said the friend whom I sent the RSVP to for my event. She had no intentions of following through with her status for my event or any other event. She hasn’t been the only one to utter those words over the years. I’ve seen RSVP and the lack thereof crawl its way up to the top of my pet peeve list. RSVP is still, even today, an important aspect of any event planning; not only for the guests, but for the planner as well. RSVP matters.

I personally believe a proper RSVP is a cornerstone of hospitality. It is a reciprocal kindness between host and guest. As a host, I am excited about my event. I am planning food whether through my own hands or through a caterer. I am considering location whether in my home or a location that better suits the needs of my event. I am thoughtful in every detail and every guest name that lands on my list. I am putting forth much time and effort in planning the event. If your name has landed on my guest list, it has been done with much consideration and I would love to have you in attendance. Now, reciprocate in kind and please reply.

RSVP, Répondez s'il vous plaît, is a French phrase that translates to "please respond."  Please respond if you will be in attendance or not. A host needs to know either way. Your response will give the host an accurate headcount which could mean the difference in adequate seating, meals, desserts, and cocktails. There isn’t a host on the planet who would want a guest to be without a seat at the table, a hot meal in which to eat, or a decadent dessert to fawn over. 

With the technologies of today, we are not limited to the old fashioned standards of handwritten replies and stamps. RSVP cards now include other options for a quicker, easier way to let the host know who will be in attendance. There are wedding websites that allow guests to simply follow the link to fill out any information needed by the host as well as give the guests more information such as local hotels, things to do, and restaurants. RSVP cards can request confirmations by text or email. The best pairing to hit the RSVP scene has to be the QR code. RSVP and QR codes go together like peanut butter and jelly, like macaroni and cheese, like salt and pepper. One says “Please reply” and the other responds with “Quick response.” A match made in event planning heaven!

So the next time you’re invited to an event, let your people know- by text, by email, by snail mail, by smoke signals. Whatever mode of communication is preferred, use it. Hosts, be clear in what you need from guests. Guests, be quick to respond. And let the party begin!

Amber Fralix